The Drakhan's Lair

Me (while grocery shopping): Cool. If I buy this Dino egg and this mini nerf crossbow, when the dinosaur hatches, I can hunt it with the bow.
Wife: Put it back. You can’t have a toy. You can’t live your whole life like it’s a book.
Me: Of course I can. I’m doing it right now and my internal narrator isn’t being kind to you.